Thursday, September 27, 2012

Lesson: Never Buy the Single-Pack Pregnancy Test

#1. 
That moment when your pee just barely touches the stick and it's instantly positive, but then you worry it's wrong, because like an idiot, you only bought the single-pack Equate brand test. So you drive frantically to CVS five minutes until they close to buy an EPT test. 

It's not as if I truly doubted the Equate test. But at times like these, you really have to hand it to the marketing genius who suggested the name "EPT: The Error Proof Test." When you're standing in the "Family Planning" aisle of CVS at 8:55, knowing they close at 9:00, you want to be as sure as possible that you're pregnant. You're going to spend the $16.99 on the EPT 2-pack.

I drove 70 mph home, and took the test as soon as I could possibly get my pants down and hover awkwardly over the toilet. Unless two "Error Proof Tests" were indeed erroneous, I am PREGNANT. 

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